Survived...

we all survived the weekend. Lunch was great on Friday - it was so good to see my friends on Friday during lunch. We had so much fun and laughed alot - and it is good to know that they will be my friends no matter what and they will always be there for me - makes me very blessed.

Friday night we had a lot of fun - it was myself and two of my girlfriends, Steve and his friend and we went to the Levee and listened to a band play. It has been years since I have done that - but we had such a blast and I ran into people I knew. It was a crazy night - lots of drinks and a couple of shots thrown in there. I saw one of the boy's friends towards the end of the evening and he had been drinking and he had started talking about dad and before I knew it he was crying, I was crying - he was upset that dad was gone and kept telling me what I great guy he was and he felt bad for not being able to make the funeral (he was out of town) and he just I guess had to let it out. God love him.....

Cary did great babysitting - the kids had so much fun and they were alive and the house wasn't burnt down - so he can come again :)..... I was so tired on Saturday - I wasn't hungover, thank goodness, but just being up until almost three and drinking and being in a smokey bar and dancing and just being out - wears you out. I keep forgetting I am not that 21 year old that can bounce back like I use to. It was fun, but I couldn't do that every weekend, I like sitting home and being with my boys :)..... Boy have I grown up! LOL

Today we had Logans' 2nd birthday party. Last week we celebrated at mom's and today was with Steve's family - too much as always, I will post pictures soon - my little baby is two - treasuring each day as I can.

Please keep Karen Lunsford (Uncle Wally/Aunt Bernie's daughter) her husband has just been diagnosed with lung cancer - as if our families have not been through enough. It is crazy - but they are continually in my prayers and my thoughts as they start this journey.

I want to adopt a baby from Haiti so bad - everytime I am watching the news and they are showing this poor children from the orphanage who have nothing anymore, no families, no place to call home, nothing - I wish I had the money to just charter a plane and go over and just take them all. We have so much here, the abundance is amazing compared to other countries and they are the cutest little babies/children......maybe this is the path I will take - just continue to pray about it.....

Keeping in touch

I learned a lot this past year through what our family has gone through and one of the most important things is that life is so short. It is important not to waste any time. I am so excited today since I am playing hooky (shhh) am going to go and have lunch with a group of people that I use to work with. We had so much fun we worked together. Some of these people I have known for 12+years - they knew me when I was a baby :). And it is always so hard for us to get together since everyone is working and since I told them I was playing hooky we are able to get together today - I can not wait.

I was amazed at dad's funeral how many people came back into our lives. I remember these people that mom and dad use to hang out with - my gosh we were so little back then, and I know through the years you get a different group of friends, or you just simply loose touch, but it was so moving to see these people pay their respects and just know that they were still friends. It's a New Year, New You with Facebook and all of the technology out there it is so easy to keep in touch with a lost friend. So look one up today - a simple Hi goes a long way. And it is always wonderful to catch up.

Tonight I am going out with a group of girls and guys and we are going to listen to a band. I use to go and listen to bands all of the time. And this band is a great party band so I am excited to be out tonight. Little nervous though, we are having Cary who is 14 babysit for us for the first time. He is spending the night and I think he is excited to have this responsibility. He told me he would have Brayden show him how to change Logan's diaper :).........

Lots to do today, I know - but it's my birthday and I have always had bad ones and this year I am going to do my best to make it an okay day. So I'll let you know in the morning how that goes.....

Oh goodness - dad make sure you are watching over them tonight LOL

Much love to all,

Funny Joke for the Ladies :)

this was in my email this morning :)

ADVICE FROM A RETIRED HUSBAND:

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.

My name is Jim. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Terri. When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Terri to get a full-time job, along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed. Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age.

I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door. She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner.

I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed. ; Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half-finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while...and, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Terri. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy...many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile...after all, we are put on this earth to help each other.

Thoughtfully,Jim

EDITOR'S NOTE: Jim died suddenly on January 7 of a perforated rectum. The police report says he was found with a Calloway extra-long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing, and a sledge hammer lying nearby. His wife Terri was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 10 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that Jim, somehow without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.

Friends - no matter what...

it is so nice to talk to someone that you haven't talked to in a long time. Your lives may go in different directions but you know this person or certain people will always be your friend. I talked to one of those people in my life last night for about an hour - we had a great conversation and I miss him dearly - but it was great hearing from him. I am going to have lunch with two of my friends on Friday. I am playing hooky as you can say from work. I am only working if you call it that half a day.

I am so bored at work - for nine hours I basically do nothing - and if any of you know my work ethic which I get from both mom and dad it is killing me. I'd rather have 100 things going on than to just sit there - it makes for a long, long day. But I am still hoping something turns up - keep looking and sending resumes out but nothing yet. But anyway I am excited to go to lunch with these friends of mine who I haven't seen since July - we have been friends for a very long time and they always know how to make me laugh!

Miss and love you dad,

Much love to all,

Is he the devil or an angel

my sweet, sweet little Logan - looking at these pictures how could one think this sweet little thing could be a wholly terror. We never had to go through the terrible twos with Brayden's - his was threes and now sixes :) LOL....

Logan - can be sweet and loving and hugging and the next minute he is on the ground wailing and throwing those little arms and hitting his head on anything he can - it is like night and day - I know it is the terrible twos and if he makes it until he is three he will be lucky J/K.... but my goodness some of the tantrums - wow. And I know he doesn't get it from me, I was the perfect child :) just kidding mom!

Mr K's - it's not....

even though I had a great time Friday night with the girls - it definitely wasn't Mr. K's - with $1 beer and $1 hot dog - let's just say you get quite the mixture of a crowd - a real mixture. I always forget Kentucky bars still have smoking so you can smell it as soon as you walk in you are just hit by the big cloud of smoke - definitely have to take showers as soon as you get home. The band was good, but the guys weren't as good looking as you would think- but then again when Mr. K's was around we always had our beer goggles on - for many of nights :)........

I was glad I went, and if you are with a crowd it is definitely a good time, but with the $1 draft - you can expect a slight headache the next morning - of course I smell draft and I get an instant headache - so I try to stay away from it... So sorry Robin, we won't be hitting that place :(......

I think this weekend I am heading out to listen to a band - The Rusty Griswolds - again they are playing in KY so the bar will be smokey - but it has been so long since I listened to a band - use to do it all of the time before the kids showed up - but then again I guess when you are younger you do alot more things before kids arrive. Plans are still up in the air but I will let you know if I venture out to that and let you know how old I felt :)........

Today there was a mass for dad at St. Anthony - it is hard to believe that is has been a year since we started this whole journey. I started this blog on January 13th and Amy's birthday was the biopsy and the results that it was cancer and my birthday was the results of what type of cancer and the expectancy of it all - doing our best to get through it - but hanging in there.

I hope everyone had a great weekend - and bundle up it is going to get cold again.... brr....... and go Colts - go Peyton Manning - he is a cutie :)

Mr. K's revised - is it true????

k - going out tonight with Tonya for her birthday and we are going to Turfway where the beer is a $1 and they have a live band - not sure if any of you who remember Mr. K's - that is how it use to be, $1 drinks and music- not knowing how you got home but ran into everyone in the world that you know there, and waking up with people calling you that you didn't know who or that you may have kissed and don't remember :)..... could this be it revised right here in our backyard.

I am so excited to go I am sure I'll be feeling my age.....

Robin, I'll let you know how it is and we'll have to get Maggie and go together one day LOL.....

I'll let you know in the morning how it is!

And yet another one.....

January is our busy month for birthdays in our family : )

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BILL.... may you get everything you wish for and more LOL

and a HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Tonya whose birthday is on Sunday the 24th!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to all the January Birthdays...............

Much love to all,

Twins for a week!

Amy and I are twins for a week. Today is Amy's birthday - and we are the same age for a whole week !!! Dad always blamed it on dances :) LOL

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMY!!!!!!!!

Resolution

okay, not really. I hate making New Year's resolutions - I never seem to keep them. I know it isn't much and most of you will probably roll your eyes, but I am committing myself to run a 5K or at least try to - I have always walked them before but this year I vow to run it - yeah right. I started working out on Monday - and taking it slow - the problem I have is I have a bad knee (old age and ACL surgery) so it takes its toll on me if I run too much.....

But I am going to try - I always admire people who do marathons and who run - they always make it look so easy. Anyone who has played ball with me knows I run a little "duckish" and would always make fun of me - so, maybe I should not do this :)

Funny moment - last night I was working out and lifting weights downstairs in our home. The boys came down with me - I had taken my shirt off - don't worry I had a sports shirt on underneath my tshirt LOL - but anyway, as I was lifting, I looked over and there was Brayden - he had taken his shirt off, had grabbed another dumbbell and was lifting too - making his grunt noises as he went - it was the funniest thing, but probably one of those moments you had to be there to see a scrawny six year old with his shirt off......

But hey, at least he wasn't in front of the TV watching it or playing Wii. So we are off to a good start so far. We are watching what we eat, drinking more water and we are going to try to run a small 5k - too many that isn't much, but to us who like to eat and drink beer- it is a lot :)

Miss and love you dad,

Much love to all!

Change

" Growth means change and change involves risk, stepping from the known to the unknown" Author unknown

Life is about change - whether it is personal growth, spiritual growth, mental growth - we all grow in our ways in our own time. We may go from long hair to short hair, from eating bad to eating right, to having little faith to having extreme faith. Growth is scary - you are use to your norm of your life.

For instance my sister and I were talking last week about our faith and how we want to get more out of our faith. We go to the Catholic church because that is all we know, that is how we were brought up. but what about the non-denomination churches, the Baptist Churches, the Pentacostal churches - we all believe in God, we all want to do right in the world and treat others kindly so why isn't it okay or why is it frowned upon if you check out other churches.

I have nothing against the Catholic faith - but there are questions just like if I was brought up as a Baptist I am sure there would be questions. I just think I am growing in my faith and stepping out of the "norm" is scary thing -I think your spiritual growth is even scarier - at least for me. At least if I decided to cut my hair short, which I did last night :), it will grow back LOL......

But aren't we suppose to challenge our norm - our we not suppose to grow and change as humans?

So much fun...

well Perfect North was a success. We had so much fun. We even took Logan who is only two - I was nervous at first to see if he would even stay seated in the tube but they have children's tubes and he just sat there not knowing what was going on. After the first time the hill he looked up and said "wee" and he had this big huge smile on his face. We stayed there two hours which was long enough for our first time. Brayden said it was the best time he has ever had in a long time. Of course it was 50 degrees and it wasn't that cold.

So it was a successful day with the boys. But I felt bad not knowing that mom was by herself all day yesterday - I thought others were going to be there and it didn't happen. But we all came today and she is doing well. You can not even tell she had surgery, but she said after you have had c-sections this is nothing.

Hopefully this weather stays the way it is - I am not one for the cold, I like the milder temperatures. Hope everyone had a great weekend.

"The Soul is healed by being with children" Fyodor Dostoyevsky. If you are ever hurting this saying is so true. Living for your children and just being around them can cure any heartache.

Miss and love you dad,

Much love to all

It's Saturday

as Brayden came down the steps saying Woo Hoo, it's Saturday. He is SO excited about going to Perfect North, I know it probably isn't much, but to a six year old it's the world right now. We had to check out the website already this morning - I just hope it isn't super crowded to where we will not be able to snow tube - please don't let that happen.

Mom is doing well, being stubborn mom. Amy spent the night last night just in case and she called me this morning saying mom doesn't want anyone coming over to babysit her today - she is fine and she can take care of everything. I personally think she is overdoing it.

I know dad and God are watching over her. I was thinking this morning how things happen in life. The poor Haiti people. My gosh, they had enough problems in their life and now this earthquake. It makes you wonder why things happen, why so many people have to be destroyed and hurt. It is sad and it breaks my heart. So please keep those people and all of the relief workers and Aid headed their way in your prayers.

Off to cleaning and then to the slopes. I'll try to take pictures today - I believe we have a whole group going now so it should be really fun!

Miss and love you dad,

Much love to all!

Surgery

mom's surgery went well. she had her gall bladder removed - but everything went well and she is home resting now. well as much as mom will rest. she doesn't seem to take a rest. funny story: i was in kroger's getting mom's prescription filled and i hear this " mam watch my cart don't back up too far so you don't hit it. " i turned around and it was aunt rita - funny... maybe you should of been there.

but just wanted to give a quick update while i had a second.

much love to all,

God's Presence

i have always talked about how I felt God there with us during dad's last week. Here is a comment from Aunt Rita - I am glad she felt it too. And she is right we can only be so lucky to have died the way he did.

I can truly say that I felt God's presence during your Dad's last days on earth. I have never been present at such a beautiful and moving death. I pray that we all have such a death with the love which touched us all. I believe it was because your dad really reached out in love to us all. I think of his death often and meditate on why it was so special.

Mom's surgery is today - it is no biggie she says - but I think anytime anyone has to be put under - it is a biggie. I will post later today and let you know how it goes, but like mom says " it's no biggie " :)

Brayden is super excited - he has asked me for a week now if we are going to Perfect North. We didn't go last weekend because it was way too cold and because of the football game. So I told him we would go this weekend and lucky for me it is going to be almost 50degrees :).. He was all sad this morning and in tears because he saw the snow had melted - and he thinks we are unable to go now. I told him we would be able to, he just doesn't quite understand it :) LOL

Miss and love you dad,

Much love to all!

More on "The Shack"

in the book the man describes eternity as a place where the colors are bright and perfect, the waterfalls are everflowing, the air is crisp and clean, the beauty of the place is outstanding, a place that one can only dream of. When this man reaches eternity or this place he sees three people, God is cooking, Jesus is in his woodshop building and the Holy Spirit is floating about in her garden. When I read this description of what this man was seeing it sent chills down my spine.

The Thursday before dad passed away when we were each individually summoned to his room to say our goodbyes, when I was with him, he kept talking about this peaceful place, where there was no pain, where the animals were running around freely, where the colors were just magnificent and he kept saying it is such a beautiful peaceful place. He would go on to tell me and the next couple of days tell all of us, that he kept seeing someone and he was reaching out to him. I believe dad is in eternity - he had found his way home to God. I believe they are up there along with Jesus and the Holy Spirit and Uncle Wally and all others who have gone before us just having a great time, enjoying life, enjoying being free from this world.

This book, again - just an amazing, amazing read!

God says " As you grow in relationship with me what you do will simply reflect who you really are."

If you truly grow with God and you accept his undying love for you, you can truly be who he created you to be. Your life will be so full and so complete and just an undying happiness that nothing can tear you down - for you have accepted God's love. But that is a lot easier said than done. It is easy to let this world get us down, it is easy to forget that you are loved no matter what happens and there is always forgiveness. We all need to strive to accept this love, this undying love and just be who we were meant to be.

Miss and love you dad!

Much love to all,

Mayonnaise Jar and Beer

I received this in my email and felt it was so true - especially for those of us who drink. And if you don't drink, then it still is important to grab a water or coke, just as long as you make time for friends

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls .. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---your
family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car..

The sand is everything else---the small stuff. 'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

'Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented. The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.'

The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.'.....


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aunt Rita: Mom is having gall stone surgery on Friday. She had a couple of attacks before Christmas and they want to go in a zap them out - hopefully it will not turn into more than that. But we will keep everyone updated, also updates about Julie's tests.

Much love to all,

The Shack by William Paul Young

is a book that has completely beginning to change my life. Aunt Toni was reading this book during the vigils at mom and dad's in July and I have just now got around to reading it. It is one of those books that you just can't put down. I am re-reading it for the second time and I am journaling all of these thoughts and sayings that are hitting me hard. It is just an amazing book and it is what I would love to believe and think that eternity is like.

The past couple of years I have been feeling a pulling to become closer to God - I have gone through alot in my life - most of it my doing, but there has always been this pulling. And it wasn't until dad got sick and passed away that I had to turn, completely turn to something higher than me to take care of me and help me through - life. This book is just - for me, an amazing read and came to me for a reason.

It is about a man who suffers a tragedy in his life and a couple of years later is summoned basically by God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. It is his conversations with them that leads him out of the Great Sadness and to be able to live again. Each day I will write something or a phrase that has just hit me and share my thoughts, I guess kind of like a online book report :)

God speaking and he says " When all you can see is your pain, perhaps then you lose sight of me?"

And really what we should be doing is in pain is turning towards him. I know I am guilty of blaming God for a lot, especially these last couple of years. And it is not that he isn't with us all of the time, but it was more like how could you cause so much pain to a family, how come if you are the God of all that is good, why is there such evil in the world. I have been quick to judge and blame God when in reality I should of been realizing that he had been there right by my side the whole time. He took care of us, he comforted us. It is hard to fathom that he is always there when you don't see him, but that is what faith is.

I believe now more than ever after reading this book, that God and dad and Uncle Wally and all that have gone before us are right there, sitting next to me each day, being there with me with each decision I make whether good or bad, being there loving me for who I am.

Sorry for rambling, but this book, it has just had such a powerful effect on me - I am sure I will be rambling some more :)

Miss and love you dad,

Much love to all,

Gloves

why is it that two year olds can not keep their gloves on - that age was always the worst to take them out in the snow. The boys were like little kids in the candy store. They were so excited when I picked them up so they could get home and go outside. By the time they went to the bathroom, changed a diaper, got both snowsuites on, boots, gloves, hats, chapstick and one last wipe of the noses, I was wiped out. And of course we get outside and Brayden lasted maybe ten minutes. He made his snow angels and rolled down our little bitty hill.

We really do not have a place he can go sled riding - we normally go over to mom and dad's which we probably will this weekend. They did help me shovel the snow - I missed dad with his snow blower. But it was a good work out - but having to stop every five minutes to put gloves back on - becaming a little much. It was cute because Brayden and Logan both tried to help me shovel - they did well!.....

Brayden is so snow bound that I am taking him to Perfect North tomorrow to go snow tubing - he will love it. We are going to go during the Bengals game so hopefully it won't be crowded - yeah right!.....

I hope everyone has a great day and stay warm -

Miss and love you dad!

Much love to all,

Snow Day

Snow day for all of the kiddos - but where is my snow day. It would be nice to have businesses close just like school you know. Brayden is super excited to be off today - he is hoping it snows like they say so he is off tomorrow too.

Not sure if anyone reads the comment section, but Julie (Aunt Judy's daughter) her surgery went well, so that is Great news. I know mom, Aunt Sandy and Aunt Rita are all having different procedures down this month, just keep them in your prayers that everything goes well.

My girlfriend and I had a discussion last night after volleyball, about confession. Isn't it odd that you have to (if you are Catholic) go and confess your sins to a priest who is just like you and I, who probably has his own sins. We were both saying that it is okay if you don't go to confession, that as long as you have a relationship with God and you confess your sins to him, that you will be forgiven. No need for a priest to tell you to do ten hail mary's to be forgiven. Maybe I am wrong, but some things of the Catholic faith does not make sense to me at least.

I heard this song on the radio yesterday and I loved it, I loved the words to it so I am posting it. I hope everyone has an enjoyable snow day and be careful driving home. Hopefully some of you are the lucky ones and do not have to be out in it :)

Three in the morning,

And I'm still awake,

So I picked up a pen and a page,

And I started writing,

Just what I'd say,If we were face to face,

I'd tell you just what you mean to me,

I'd tell you these simple truths,

Be strong in the Lord and,Never give up hope,

You're going to do great things,

I already know,God's got His hand on you so,

Don't live life in fear,Forgive and forget

,But don't forget why you're here,

Take your time and pray,

These are the words I would say,

Last time we spoke,You said you were hurting,

And I felt your pain in my heart,I want to tell you,

That I keep on praying,

Love will find you where you are,

I know cause I've already been there,

So please hear these simple truths

Be strong in the Lord and,Never give up hope,

You're going to do great things,I already know,

God's got His hand on you so,

Don't live life in fear,

Forgive and forget,

But don't forget why you're here,

Take your time and pray,

These are the words I would say,

From one simple life to another,I will say,

Come find peace in the Father,

Be strong in the Lord and,

Never give up hope,

You're going to do great things,

I already know,God's got His hand on you so,

Don't live life in fear,

Forgive and forget,But don't forget why you're here,

Take your time and pray,

Thank God for each day,

His love will find a way,

These are the words I would say

(Sidewalk Prophets)

Brr...............

it is cold outside. I hate winter - it is my least favorite season. I like the snow for a day but to drive in it and trying to keep the car clean, just basically stinks. Yesterday I had the day off because Logan had his two year check up - he is 30lbs and is short - go figure! He is doing well, just typical #2 child and a boy - so stubborn and it is his way or no way. Brayden was so easy :)

So we got to pick Brayden up from school as he was standing outside with no hat and his coat not zipped, it must be a boy thing :) I was able to hang out with the boys all afternoon - we had a lot of fun I wish it was something I could do everyday. But able to get out of the house for a bit. If I could work about 20 hours a week and get paid for 40 - that would be the life wouldn't it. I still need the adult interaction, but I'd like to be a parent involved at school. But sending them to a Catholic school mamma has to work, so it's okay.

Tonight is our first girls volleyball game for the season - woo hoo! Some girlfriends and I have been playing since high school and even though we are getting old and are starting to not get up off the floor much faster, we still have a blast and it is a good excuse for us to get together. I love it.

Big snowfall tomorrow?? Will it happen or will it not happen?? If it does everyone be safe and careful - I am dreading making the drive across the river in the morning - it is going to stink. I hope everyone is staying warm -

Sleepless Night

not sure if it was the anxiety of going back to work or my mind going a million miles a minute - did not sleep at all last night, maybe an hour. I could not get dad out of my mind, which is a good thing, but it also kept me up - just thinking of how it all started last year and it has almost been a year since our journey began with both dad and Uncle Wally. I think it was that and the stress of trying to find a new job in this economy - Ha, Ha, Ha right, I know.

It is amazing how fast time goes by - I know we have a couple of surgeries happening in the family this month - so hopefully nothing awful comes as a result of them - I think we have had enough for a year - don't you think.

I hope everyone has a happy Monday and hopefully my mind will rest tonight so I can sleep :)

Much love to all,

New Years

I hope everyone had a safe and happy new year. It was one year ago for us that mom and dad made that call saying that they found spots on his pancreas and they were going to do a biopsy. Can't believe it's been a year since that fateful call -

It has been a rough last two years with losing Steve's dad in 2008 and then losing dad and Uncle Wally both in 2009 - it is easy to say the last two years have well basically sucked. And I thought 2010 was going to be a good year, start out well. Well Brayden's fish Scooby died this morning - just laying there, no movement. He was sad, very sad and cried a little bit. He had the fish for two years - it was a birthday present from Uncle Sean and well as we told Brayden it was his time to go. Brayden being the sweet boy that he is said well I think Grandpa and Grandpa just needed a pet so they took Scooby - I said you are probably right and they will take great care of him.

Took all the Christmas decorations down - house looks blah again. I love the holidays and decorating and having lights on and candles lit - it is just something in the air/atmosphere that just makes everything calm.

2010 - to a year of peace, year of health and happiness. To postivie thinking and to losing some pounds :)... To not worrying about trying to change the past because you can't - you just have to move on, to serving God and others, to putting yourself last and to being the person you were meant to be. 2009 was a lost year for me - I lost myself and who I was suppose to be. I am finding myself again and becoming at peace with who I am and with what I have lost - may 2010 also bring me a new job - which can't come soon enough - and to bring health and happiness to all our family and friends.

Thank you to each one of you who helped us through this past year - it was a difficult one for everyone - and through it all we have counted our blessings and held our loved ones close - may we continue to love each other, show the love for each other and speak the love to each other and just do it on a daily basis and not wait for a dreaded phone call saying spots have been found.

Heading out to watch the game - may everyone have a great rest of the weekend.

Here is to each one of you for a Happy and Healthy 2010 - may it bring you joy, love and happiness.

Miss and love you dad!

Much love to all,