Oh what a horrible day today was. It is breaking my heart to type this and I wish I didn't have to so soon.
I picked up mom and dad this morning and I could tell dad wasn't feeling well. His color wasn't good and he wasn't talkative. He hasn't been eating much and his stomach was bloated. We went and saw Dr. Draper. He said the words we dreaded to hear" It is the beginning of the end" How does one take in those words, how do you fully comprehend what he is saying. It can't be, not now, we just lost Uncle Wally, we can't be losing dad too so fast. Dr. Draper went on to say the tumor has grown to where he can feel it with his hands, dad is losing weight too quickly, he is in constant pain, his numbers aren't good.
I tell you - today was the worst day ever. Dad cried, mom cried, I cried, Dr. Draper cried. He has grown to love our family and him and dad had such a great relationship - we were truly blessed to have him as a doctor - truly blessed.
So now, we have called in hospice, they are suppose to be here tomorrow - the goal is to just keep dad as comfortable as possible as his body is shutting down. We have been having many moments today, all of us have been here, some longer than others, crying, laughing, drinking, and drinking some more :).... But dad - he has been such a trooper and so strong. After this morning and the initial shock of hearing the news, he is making his jokes like he has to watch his weight - he has to look good for the blondes waiting for him. Amy - God love her, asked dad if he could make some dinners so we could freeze them so we didn't have to eat mom's cooking on Sundays :)
We knew this day was going to come, but not so soon, I was hoping for a year, not a month after Uncle Wally passed away. He must be bored up there, and he needs someone to pick on. LOL :)
So we deal, we continue to deal with it the way we know how to. We cry, we laugh, we drink and we be together. And as dad says he wants to talk about it, because after the initial shock of it and the initial tears of the news, he just wants to live his life the best he can.
Please, please do not hesitate to call here or come and visit - it really helps him get his mind off things. And if he is having a bad day, we will let you know.
Much love to all,
My heart is broken :-( for you and your family. I know it is such a sad day... I will pray for God to grant You the grace to withstand the sadness in your heart. I do Thank god everyday that he has prepared a place for all of us to be together again. With no pain, no sadness, no grief.
ReplyDeletePeace be with you, and your mother, and brother's, and sisters.
Love Sue.
Bill, Cookie,
ReplyDeleteJenny, Amy, Michele, Sean, Jeremy
and family.
Well, here we are, again. I keep telling myself that God only gives us what we can bear.
He didn't tell me how hard that was going to be.
Then I just stop thinking me and think of how much He gave for us. Then its O.K.
May God give you comfort and peace at this time. Holy Mary Mother of God, stand guard over our brother Bill and be watchful for him.
Dave, Uncle Dave
Dearest Family- My heart breaks at this latest sadness. All of our family is thinking of all of you and praying for you. How much loss can one family take so close together in time? Please know that we are praying and crying too. we ask each other what we can do. We know to pray. In the horrible things I have had to bear I have been lifted up and carried through by the prayers of others. I have asked how we are to bear this and then I know that someone is praying for me/us because I get the strength to go on. As always, let us know how we can help all of you. We are here and we love you. We are all family to each other. That is the only way we can manage the sadness. All our love, Uncle Tom, Aunt Diana and all their kids. xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteFamily:
ReplyDeleteOrry is sitting next to me and asked if he could post something, of course I have to type, but oh well. Here is what he said.
Uncle Bill, thank you for letting me come out to your house and spending time with you. I loved it when Buddy Boy (Dad) brought me out there with him. You were always so nice to me. I love you Uncle Bill.
I found this little poem and thought it might be something we can reflect on.
THE CLOCK OF LIFE
The clock of life is wound but once
And no man has the power
to tell just when the hands will stop
at late or early hour.
To lose one's wealth is sad indeed
To lose one's health is more.
To lose one's sould is such a loss
as no man can restore.
The present only is our own
Live, love, toil with a will.
Place no faith in tomorrow
for the clock may then be still.
Love,
Kirsten and Orry
Bill, Cookie, and Family
ReplyDeleteWe are very sorry and so sad to hear the latest news. It came even quicker than we had expected. Our love, thoughts and prayers go out to each and every one of you. May God be with you during such a difficult time.
Love,
Rosalind and Dick
Dear Bill,Cookie, Amy, Michelle, Jenny, Sean,Jeremy
ReplyDeleteI have started this comment so many times. My heart is full of tears, love, prayers. Bill, you are my hero. You are such an inspiration to us all. You have shown us how to live life every day with humor, joy, determination, prayer, and acceptance. May God be with you each day.
Please let me know if there is a way I can help.
My prayers and love for "my little brother" who is showing me how to live life.
Love
Rita
Michelle, Thank you so much for creating this blog. Rick and I spent some time with you mom and dad this morning. We are so blessed to have wonderful neighbors. We are here for you and your family if you need anything, please don't hestiate to ask.
ReplyDeleteThis is something you already know, but it is what I thought about after spending time with your dad. Your dad has touched so many lifes by the way he lives and he continues to touch lives now going through this pain. He won't know the amount of people whose lives he made a difference in until he gets to Heaven. It reminds me of the song written by Ray Boltz called Thank You for Giving to the Lord..I tried to post the lyrics, but they would not copy..
Rick, Blake, Kristen and I are continually praying for all of you during this difficult time.