First Breakdown

the pressure of being a 3rd grader and being responsible has finally hit Brayden. Last night he broke down into tears because he forgot a paper at school. It was a spelling paper that he had to do homework on. He puts so much pressure on himself to do so well in school that he was so afraid that Steve and I and his teacher was going to be mad at him. So instead of telling us right away, he kept it inside of him until he let it go. Just scares me that if he isn't willing to talk to us about school what else will he not tell us.

I blame myself, that is a mommy trait. Mom would always be mad at me because I was never a big talker. Sure I can write and write to express my feelings and emotions but when it comes to actually "talking" not so good at it. I am a very emotional person and I let things build up inside me. I don't like to deal with tough issues, at least talking wise. I remember growing up Amy and Jenny always being the great talkers with mom, staying up late sharing, laughing, but not me, I would rather go to sleep than to stay up talking. Not sure if that is a Timmerding trait or what, it is just the way I am. And now poor Brayden has the same trait. I am doing my best to make him feel comfortable enough to tell me anything and everything - but not sure if it is working or not.

On another note, Mr. Logan is being Mr. Questions all of a sudden. Last weekend we watched some home movies and they were mostly of Brayden. You know how with the first child you have millions of videos of them, and the second child you may have one. As Brayden was watching the videos, or as I said, "I feel like it is the Jenny show all over again " :)  (I say that because all of our home movies are mainly of Jen, and I think Jeremy has one picture of him LOL), any whoo, Logan kept asking where he was, he asked why Brayden was wearing his PJ's, and all of this has started the questions of how did I get here. All week he has been asking me, Mommy how did I get into your belly, Mommy how did I get out of your belly, why did God put me inside your belly mom, how did he do that? I remember when it was dark in your belly mommy and I didn't like it? and it goes on and on and on. Any answer I give him brings up another question. My final answer was " Go talk to your daddy " LOL....

Parenting - hardest job we will ever do - I just hope I don't screw it up.

Just found out one of my favorite artists is in town this weekend at Bogarts - Woo Hoo. Bogarts, what memories from that place.

I hope everyone is having a great week - enjoying the rain soaked week.

Miss and love you dad ~ so much.

Much love to all,